Widow's Mite

As I lay here this morning, I can tell that this is going to be a low energy day.  A low energy day means that I need to be extra careful with how I use my limited supply of energy.  It means that I need to decide what is really important for me to get done today and plan around that, cutting out extra things.  Some days cutting out extra things means not washing my hair.  Some days it means changing dinner plans from the soup I was going to make, to heating up a box of pasta and a jar of sauce.  On a really low energy day it means asking one of my kids to heat up the food.  

Often, it means not doing something that somebody else can do instead.  It means that even though I was planning on going to my daughter's concert,  I will stay home while my husband goes and makes a video recording of the concert.  We will later gather around the computer while I watch the recording of the concert instead of the live version.  I'll try to be positive and give her lots of extra praise and hope it makes up for the fact that I've missed another event.  I'll tell her that I will try to make it to the next one even though we both know that there is no guarantee that the next time I'll have any more energy than I did this time.

Even before I was sick, I wanted more energy.  I always felt like there was more that I wanted to get done than I ever could accomplish.  Now, however, energy is like water in the desert; it alludes me and escapes from my grasp.  It is a precious resource that I am trying to secure.  I'm always sure that I see an oasis up ahead, but when I arrive I realize that I am still surrounded by desert.

This morning I was reading the story of the widow's mite and I felt like that widow.  She was lacking money and I am lacking energy, but we both are lacking a precious resource.

"And he saw also a certain poor widow casting in thither two mites. And he said, Of a truth I say unto you, that this poor widow hath cast in more than they all:For all these have of their abundance cast in unto the offerings of God: but she of her penury hath cast in all the living that she had." Luke 21:1-4

I feel like I have so little to give, but I am grateful that God only asks me to give what I have.  When I give of my meager offering, He accepts it.  My family too, is patient and understanding and accept what I have to offer.

Perhaps I used to have more energy, but I think I wasted a lot of it before.  I had the abundance, but I didn't always use it for the most important things.  I feel that having such limited energy has made me reconsider how I spend this meager resource.  Having less energy has helped me to see how precious my moments are.  Maybe all I have the energy to do today is to lay in bed and listen to my daughters tell me about their days, but I will cherish those moments.  I cherish having my kids gather in my room as we laugh and cry about the things that life throws their way.  I don't want to be distracted by other things.  The resource of my time and energy are precious and I don't want to waste them on things of lesser importance. 

Like the widow, I may not have much to give, but I will give all that I have and the rest tends to work itself out.  That is the miracle of acknowledging the Savior in our life: He accepts what we offer and He makes up the difference.